ratboy [they/them]
- 20 Posts
- 47 Comments
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
Ye Power Trippin' Bastards@lemmy.dbzer0.com•Am I racist?English
5·9 months agoYeah, it can be hard to figure out just what to say when it comes to topics like this. It’s great that you’re trying to be sensitive and do better, though! I think when talking about women’s bodies especially its best to stay away from saying things like “masculine” or “skinny” or “fat”, even if youre not attaching negative meaning to it.
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
Ye Power Trippin' Bastards@lemmy.dbzer0.com•Am I racist?English
7·9 months agoThis is coming from a person living in the US, so keep that in mind as i give this explanation, I’m also assuming this is a good faith question: oftentimes women of color are called masculine or manly in order to strip them of their femininity and insinuate that they are ugly because they dont fit very narrow, white beauty standards. It’s considered misogynistic and racist. Also in the US “minorities” usually refers to people of color, so someone reading your comment could read it to mean “yeah, this person is puerto Rican so she has a masculine body type”. I think the way your comment is worded looks a bit strange as well, like youre objectifying her on top of all that.
You saying that English is not your first language leads me to believe that those things weren’t your intention and can even make your comment look like you are being complimentary, but if someone didnt know that it definitely looks questionable/racist
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
Asklemmy@lemmy.ml•I (M32) gained 140lbs in a year from bad choices, almost all in my belly (now 69-inches) due to rare genetics. With my unique proportions, I’ve outgrown most off-the-rack clothing options. Advice?English
3·10 months agoHi there, first I’m so sorry you have to deal with this. It’s on a much smaller level but I’ve always struggled with body dysmorphia and clothes shopping is an absolute nightmare, it doesn’t help that sizing can vary so greatly between brands and most of what is carried in stores are for “average sized” people.
Anyway, I really think you’ll probably have to just shop online AND probably go to a tailor, based on what you’ve shared about your shape. It sucks, but then you can get something that fits you perfectly and it will probably feel much better than just getting something way oversized that is super baggy in some spots and not in others.
I found this website called Johnny Bigg that carries dress shirts up to an 8X. According to their size charts, an 8x can fit a 69-71" chest, so I’m thinking that you could get away with buying shirts from there, maybe, and bringing them to get tailored. Here is a nice button down shirt from them. It is possible that you might need to buy completely custom made dress pants though. Do you wear your pants over or under your belly? Not sure your exact shape but if you are able to wear pants under it, that might not be preferable for you but can cut down on the size significantly.
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
Announcements@lemmy.ml•Lemmy needs more donationsEnglish
16·10 months agoJeez thats a huge cut from Patreon what the hell! Will definitely switch
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
Announcements@lemmy.ml•Lemmy needs more donationsEnglish
24·10 months agoAre any of the posted platforms better or worse to subscribe to? Patreon is easiest but if there are any percentages taken out etc etc I’ll switch it up

ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
DeGoogle Yourself@lemmy.ml•*Permanently Deleted*English
9·10 months agoI think YouTube would be the toughest for me to quit as well. But I use it almost exclusively for music; I listen to a lot of underground/independent artists and its just so easy to find everything I want, and their algorithm works decently well so that I can discover or rediscover artists. Being able to use the app on my TV is another attractive part of it too. I admit I havent spent too much time in newpipe or any of the other alternatives; it would probably get easier if I made myself use it and ease in but I just don’t!
Good on you! Do you have any sort of budget at all? Single speed bikes can be a bit cheaper than those with gears. By single speeds I don’t mean fixed gears, which I am even weary of riding even though I’ve been an avid cyclist for like 12 years. If you look on craigslist or Facebook marketplace (if you’re in the US) you can usually find bikes for decent prices that are used! If you go that route and find a single speed, make sure the brakes seem to work okay how I do this is ill stand by the bike, press both brake levers down, and try to push it forward. If it only moves a bit or not at all, it’s probably fine. I’d try both the front and back individually. If the levers press all the way down to the handlebars before they start to give any resistance, that means the brakes need to be replaced (cheap), but could mean they need to be adjusted. Not a bad thing necessarily as you can bring it to a shop, but just something to look out for as an extra immediate expense.
Depending on where you live, there may be shops that refurbish old bikes for discounts too so search around. There may also be bike rentals, too. Might be a good option so you can try a bike without committing to purchasing at first.
Getting on a bike can feel intimidating but you’ll get it. Practice riding in a straight line in a place where there is no car traffic. If you go too slow, you will probably fall because it takes a lot more balance to keep yourself up if you’re barely pedaling; that’s why “track stands” are so difficult. So try not to be afraid, you have your breaks and your feet so if you feel yourself tilting you can always put your foot down while gently pressing on the brakes to keep yourself from falling over. You could even just push yourself forward kinda hard with your foot without pedaling to get a feel for how the bike moves and you can stop yourself with brakes/feet. You wont fly over the handlebars when you’re learning. In my opinion the worst that might happen is that you fall on your side if you’re pedaling too slowly, or if you trip over yourself when biking. The worst thing to be hurt is your ego, though lol.Always a good idea to get a helmet too. I’d say it’s mandatory.
An important thing is to make sure that the bike is a good fit. This is a chart. You can ask the seller what the size is if they haven’t specified. Some people like the feel of a bike that’s a little smaller or bigger but youll want to generally follow the guide. You can adjust the saddle size to fit you as well. Ideal saddle height is when the saddle hits your hip bone. It might feel a lil scary/tall if you’re just starting to learn but that’s what it should be; your pedaling will be most effective and your knees will thank you. When you bring the bike home you can slam the saddle down lower so that you can learn to ride and get comfy on the bike but once you learn to do it raise the saddle back to your hip bone. Youll get used to it and you’ll probably be able to tell the difference.in comfort and that your pedal strokes will feel more “powerful”.
Let me know if you have any other questions and I’m happy to help!
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
World News@lemmy.ml•‘NYTimes’ biased coverage of Amsterdam soccer violence attempts to hide Israeli racismEnglish
21·1 year agoI read an article yesterday, may have been from CBS News or something??? It took FOURTEEN PARAGRAPHS before ANYTHING at all was mentioned about the “death to arab” chants and burning of Palestinian flags. Before and after that paragraph it was all talking about jews being chased down in the streets, it’s horrifying that people would do this, in ashamed of our country, it was a pogrom…then just casually dropping the real reason it happened. I couldn’t believe they even included that info at all
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
Comradeship // Freechat@lemmygrad.ml•Today is my birthdayEnglish
10·2 years agoHAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
Comradeship // Freechat@lemmygrad.ml•For god's sake, be polite!English
0·2 years agoWhat do you think makes people get so cynical? I just don’t understand it.
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
Comradeship // Freechat@lemmygrad.ml•For god's sake, be polite!English
7·2 years agoI haven’t read the whole thing but it sure did make me wanna cry and quit my job lol
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
Comradeship // Freechat@lemmygrad.ml•For god's sake, be polite!English
411·2 years agoI just recently saw a couple of posts on reddit that blew my mind with how condescending and downright hostile some folks were to someone asking an honest question on the fucking communism101 sub. Basically the person asking a question about if being a lawyer would be a good profession to get into to assist people and they were basically told that they just wanted to live a cushy life and were self serving, unethical, and basically gave the impression that whatever good they wanted to do was just liberal fantasy. I felt so bad for OP especially since it was a communism for beginners sub. There was a similar post on the regular r/communism where OP got their ass chewed out too. I can see getting annoyed with those types of questions but good lord did they leave a bad taste in my mouth.
One person did post a pretty interesting article that has made me shift my perspective a bit but even in that they called social workers pathetic and like, how is that constructive at all?
Panty liners is honestly a brilliant idea! I used to go sans underpants but uh, tight jeans is not the jam for that. I think having multiple pairs of pants you rotate through+panty liners would be the best bet.
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netOPto
World News@lemmy.ml•Ukraine minister says he wants to turn his country into a weapons production hub for the WestEnglish
32·2 years agoI’m not familiar with the history of US interest in Ukraine but that does not surprise me. As someone seeing the war happen and knowing it was against Russia I figured it was about the “noble fight against communism” but combined with the fact that an aim is also to be a large scale weapons manufacturer sounds like there is gonna be much much more Imperialism to do besides fighting Russia.
It just kinda tied things together for me yesterday learning about the natural resources in Gaza that Israel is likely after as well as conflicts like the Armenian genocide, the strengthening of US relations with other countries in the area, all of it
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
Comradeship // Freechat@lemmygrad.ml•“I support the Palestinians, but I’m against Hamas.”English
291·2 years agoAlso, since October 7th, the entire world has been watching Palestine. This is what had to be done in order to bring any overwhelming attention to the conditions that Palestinians have been living under since 1948 and prior to that honestly. I’ve been saying “What’s sad is that it has had to come to this” instead of focusing on Hamas bad with people.
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
GenZedong@lemmygrad.ml•What are your takes on consensual sex work?English
5·2 years agoI see what you’re saying. I didn’t intend to make you feel that you needed to explain yourself in the way you did here; I think after reading through your comments again I understood much more clearly where you were coming from, and I appreciate you expanding on that even further for my benefit. My mind isn’t changed completely, but you do make very good points that I’d like to reflect on. I also wasn’t under the impression that you were trying to make anyone feel bad, and I’m sorry if I came off that way after this last response. I think a lot of my questions and statements were more rhetorical, I wasn’t trying to challenge you or change your mind, genuinely. Sometimes the way I express myself can come off more confrontational than it’s meant to be (to the exclusion of my first comment to you that was a dick comment and I feel bad for that). Anyway I respect the disengagement, and I appreciate your effort especially if it was frustrating for you, wish it wasn’t
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
GenZedong@lemmygrad.ml•What are your takes on consensual sex work?English
5·2 years agoOh my fucking god I just wrote out a big huge thoughtful response to what you said and to your other comments AND IT ALL GOT DELETED FUCK.
Ugh I really cannot bring myself to type it all up again but I definitely want to say: I wasn’t trying to engage in bad faith, and I’m sorry if I came off as inflammatory, I wasn’t trying to attack you but the language of your posts rubbed me the wrong way. Either way I do owe you an apology for that so my bad.
I went back and more carefully read through all of your posts. Over all, I definitely agree with your positions in general on exploitation, abuse, objectification, etc. I just disagree that the focus on sex work will ameliorate all of those problems as women and others are objectified and abused outside of sex work, that abuse wouldn’t stop if sex work were to stop, violence will be perpetrated in other ways. To me addressing misogyny is the bigger fish to fry as that could either make sex work obsolete, or make it into something safe where people can engage in it with actual consent and agency. But we have no idea what the outcome would be until we are in a position where the impositions of capitalism and the patriarchy are addressed. Also I did appreciate your points about women and misogyny and that got me thinking about women being willing accomplices to men in trying to perpetuate violent oppression against women in order to be “not like the others”. I also appreciated your point about treating a hobby as a job and that’s something I want to think about, and learn more about necessary vs unnecessary labor.
Trans-women are women and women are not your fetish or kink they are people my friend.
This kinda feels like an insinuation that I don’t think trans women are women and that’s not my position. I mentioned “people of different genders”, I didn’t single out trans women in that sentence.
edit: another thought: so I definitely believe that the voices of sex workers should be front and center in these conversations, but under communism, generally, it would be the voice of the greater majority that would dictate what is and isn’t good for the group, right? I would assume that the majority of sex workers would want to abolish it since many are forced either by another individual or by economic circumstance. In that case we can absolutely do without it, and that small minority that engage in it because they just enjoy it, should be able to sacrifice it for the betterment of the community.
Double edit: eesh I went back and re-read my comment and yeah that was a rude ass comment, embarrassing
ratboy [they/them]@hexbear.netto
GenZedong@lemmygrad.ml•What are your takes on consensual sex work?English
2·2 years agoSorry, I didn’t mean to come off hostile but in re-reading what I wrote I can totally see that, I’ll try to do better moving forward.
To the first thing, I think I was framing this with the context that sex work is a creation of the patriarchy and serves to perpetuate misogyny, sexism and exploitation. In response to this, I would think that focusing on the patriarchy, re-educating men and providing a much bigger emphasis on dismantling those violent concepts, then the nature of sex work would be fundamentally changed. It may even resolve itself, since there wouldn’t be pressure, coercion, and potentially there would not be a want for it as it stands now.
I think some of the points that I was speaking to was not just in the comment that I replied to but within the whole thread. The points that you enumerated I’m absolutely in agreement with, make no mistake about that. There were points that I interpreted as having an undercurrent of misogyny, I wasn’t trying to claim that darkcalling was doing that intentionally but that’s how it felt to me.



















Well at least it won’t matter that crop yields are plummeting due to climate change. We won’t be able to eat any of it anyway